In my room, the sunshine seeps in earlier through the patterned curtains. I wake to feel the Spring that is still a few months away. Underground is softening, warming, waiting, nurturing and growing. The lambs and cattle are lactating after a long winter and hope is blooming just around the corner.
Glimmers of golden light filter through the trees. I feel my soul being urged to be both warm and strong. I am gently encouraged to stand and remain within the full force of self rather than any belief in fatigue, age, weight, infirmity or injustices. While injustices and all these attributes are legitimate in their own right, spring reminds me that they are not ALL that I am or will be nor the world at large. They can not define me fully nor should I allow them to. With charisma, I am determined to shake of their dust and look to the air as shimmers of all that was, is and could be. But that is because my 'spring of the soul' aligns with the physical manifestation of spring to arrive. I would feel differently if my soul was still in winter's clutches.
It feels akin to walking in a darkened glade and suddenly coming upon a clearing with sunlight. In the beam of warmth stands a fawn bent over some grass. The moment provides a hushed soul ignition of inspiration and creativity. The world feels ripe with possibility. A lightness emerges both within and without. Slightly worn from the trek in the dark, it suddenly feels ok to 'be lost'...Maybe I was never lost at all? It's a new frontier of beginnings.
Or perhaps February, with it's first day an ancient celebration of Imbolc, asks for a mixture of motivation for the rest of winter but hope to begin the renewal of spring? Maybe Aphrodite's day on the 14th, though commercially used, in it's depths gives heightened acknowledgement to all forms of love? Or it could be simply that February is a often a welcome sign that January is over?
I feel it stir into all sorts of alchemical alignments. It's a story. It's a triple symbol. It's a start, an end and more importantly, a middle. I am reminded again about necessary endings. It is so nice to no longer be chasing love.
It is so beautiful to have children in my children's lives who show interest, happiness and desire to be part of their lives, our family and our home. Sometimes the sleepovers go into two nights or three and the friends can't seem to show appreciation enough. I forgot that is how teen friendship could be. I certainly had it. I am glad now that my children often do. It took an ending to get to this happy middle journey.
The space given from loss has been a glorious plot to seed multiple avenues of growth. The friends who show up occasionally are always wanting to be. They want to interact. They desire to show love. They give and also happily take. It's an unfolding process. There are joyful possibilities. No longer are the answers being chased. The process suddenly becomes the beauty. Dancing with uncertainty I find I can contribute more often in ways that matter to myself and the beautiful community we have cultivated. The energy put into chasing people or answers is now invested into mystic intention.
I don't read the news but occasionally I come across the disturbances. How can I not? In our circles too there is the tough, the honourable dark and the derisive dark. But overall, I accept, and sometimes fight, for the beauty, community, acceptance and seasons. I try to only deal with what directly affects those that are put in my path to protect and love and vice versa. There is hardship I must face or need to support others in. I have been in those seasons and will again. They have my admiration and love. Letting go of the rest, the power to control and the desire to be more is no longer a priority. In this spring season there are natural anxieties cycling within rejuvenation. I choose the brighter outlook. It’s the halfway point until official spring and I have no desire to rush the last half. There are too many things to nurture before in this liminal, gestational time.
I admit I’m a sucker for heart shaped packages, florals, boxes of shiny cards, reds and pinks and all the cheery warmth of Valentine’s Day. I’m tired of justifying why or feeling pressured to give disclosures or exceptions. I feel those that know me get that I give consideration to all. Now I’m trying to let my need to give all perspectives go and just be me. That said, Valentines has always been one of my favourite holidays. I love love. Aphrodite is one of my favourite archetypes along with Hestia who fits nicely with Imbolc.
Purdys' maple chocolates in the form of Canadian leaves are some of my favourite delights. Sour keys smothered in Rogers chocolate are also a personal weakness. Salted coffees, cinnamon hearts, cheesy cut out cards, deep reds, diamond sparkles, soft pink throws, decorative symbols of love and hearts everywhere fill my heart with glimmers. Differing seasons I receive some or all of the above and other times none... but that fact does not diminish the pure joy I see with them surrounding me. I admit the commercialism even makes me happy - just as Christmas also has aspects I love. I like seeing colour and cheer. It beats dire predictions and dreary white as far as the eye can see. While dire predictions and routine normality are important in their place, the celebrations and seasonal honouring unites. I’d rather be united in positivity and aspects of love.
Giving and taking. Thoughts and cards sent. Texts quickly constructed with heart filled gratitude. Cute and sexy together, in their respective places. February brings protected 'womb' time, energized hope, and the stirrings of passion. Hearth and home nurture love and places to create. It’s both individualized and communal. February strikes the balance as the Aspen tree, whose individual form holds hands under the earth with it's far away counterparts as part of a collective whole. We are one as one.
May you find Brigid's flame or Hestia's hearth in this halfway month. May your soul find a season to honour. May Aphrodite symbolize love and beauty. Look for the small ways love wins. Find the pockets of inspiration. Allow the gratitude and soul stirrings response to hope.
On a personal note, know I’m thankful for you, the reader, being part of this blog world and the circles of worlds created around it. I'm a seasonal soul and I am thankful for the seasons I engage with those in my surroundings.
With love and gratitude;
