Saturday, February 3, 2018

"The Art of Living", Stoic Wisdom by Epictetus. Philosophy Regarding Generosity, Sex, Monogamy, Conformity, Culture, and Pursuing the Good.

~This post should probably have a mature content warning? Maybe? You have been warned. Explicit content talk.~


Living can be tough. There is definite death, illness, hardships and other moments mixed with beautiful, bountiful happiness and love. Philosopher Epictetus lived in 55 AD and many of his philosophies withstand the test of time. He lived by stoic principles. The book "The Art of Living" is an adaptation or new interpretation of his works by Sharon Lebell. It is an easy read, full of rich wealth and wisdom and a "classical manual on virtue, happiness, and effectiveness." The book itself belongs on every bookshelf for quick, meaningful guides to life's daily deeds. While I will cover quite a few quotes from the book, the book itself is still valuable to be attained and read over and over again. Obviously, like any philosophy, stoic philosophy is not for every circumstance. There are philosophies in this book that do not apply to my journey. Everyone must critically examine all world views. Philosophy is meant to be one of the greatest tools for logic. See THIS (click) quick introduction video from Crash Course for this understanding.

*All photos of quotes and quoted material in this post are taken from this book. I will cite the pages of the quotes I use.* 
   
BE WHOM YOU ARE:


"First, say to yourself what you would be: then do what you have to do." But do this within your own limitations and reason.  "It must be our business to act our given role as best as we possibly can and to refrain from complaining about it." (pg 24)



We each have a limited time on this earth. Some get the full one hundred years, while many get a shorter span of time. So how long can we truly afford to waste on what we don't wish to be? One of the keys to being ourselves is, as Epictetus promotes, "Recognizing what is truly our own." Knowing whom we are and what we naturally have to work with. Can you write? Then write. Do you work with your hands? Find ways to create in this way. Do you love to make food? Pursue moments that enable you to give in this way. "When you carry out your bath- do it to the best of your ability..." and so on with eating food or whatever it is we are doing in this moment. 

ENVY AND GRATITUDE:

"Is someone enjoying the privileges, opportunities, or honour you desire? If the advantages that person has secured are good, then delight in that person enjoying them. It is his or her time to prosper, If those advantages actually turn out to be bad, then don't be troubled that they didn't come your way. Remember: you will never earn the same rewards as others without employing the same methods and investment of time as they do. It is unreasonable to think we can earn rewards without being willing to pay their true price. Those who "win" at something have no real advantage over you, because they had to pay the price for their reward. It is always our choice whether or not we wish to pay the price for life's rewards. And often it's best for us not to pay the price, for the price might be our integrity." (pg. 34.)

Too often we compare ourselves to other people's victories and sorrows. We don't realize that each person has a price. And each price is different for each personality. 

"How easily dazzled and deceived we are by eloquence, job title, degrees, high honours, fancy possessions, expensive clothing, or a suave demeanour. Don't make the mistake of assuming that celebrities, public figures, political leaders, the wealthy or people with great intellectual or artistic gifts are necessarily happy. To do so is to be bewildered by appearances and will only make you doubt yourself....Stop aspiring to be anyone other than your own best self; for that does fall within your control. ( pg 26.)

Gratitude and the daily practice of it, enables us to live our best lives. So does perspective. When we have gratitude for what we have there is little room for envy. When we take a balanced perspective, without assumptions, we can control our own outcomes instead of focusing on others.


THE BODY/ ANCIENT FEMINISM:

"Those who are morally untrained spend an inordinate amount of time on their bodies. Carry out your animal functions incidentally. Your main attention should be given to the care and development of your reason. For through your reason, you are able to understand nature's loss." (pg. 69.)


"Females are especially burdened by the attention they receive for their pleasing appearance. From the time they are young, they are flattered by males or evaluated only in terms of their outward appearance. Unfortunately, this can make a woman feel suited only to give men pleasure, and her true inner gifts sadly atrophy. She may feel compelled to put great effort and time into enhancing her outer beauty and distorting her natural self to please others. Sadly, many people- both men and women- place all their emphasis on managing their physical appearance and the impression they make on others. Those who seek wisdom come to understand that even the world may reward us for wrong or superficial reasons, such as our physical appearance, the family we come from, and so on, what really matters is who we are inside and who we are becoming." (pg. 68.)

I love how Epictetus sounds like a feminist here. Seems like ancients struggled just as much with the same issues we do today..."nothing new under the sun" as Solomon speaks. There still is a large disparity between the way women's bodies are treated and men's. Luckily, some of that is changing but it is still an issue. Both men AND women need to take their collective and individual responsibility for this issue. .

"Nothing truly stops you. Nothing truly holds you back. For your own will is always within your control. Sickness may challenge your body. But are you merely your body?... Your will needn't be affected by an incident unless you let it. Remember this with everything that happens to you." (pg 35)

With chronic illness I have had to learn the lesson above over and over again. Unfortunately it never sticks for long. I get knocked down but then I get up again ( and now that song is in my head...) but it takes me awhile. I have to continually remind myself that my will is within my control no matter what happens around me.

SEX/ MONOGAMY in LONG TERM PARTNERSHIPS and GRACE AND FRANKIE:

Monogamy is not in vogue but it is a time tested road to fulfillment for many people. "Abstain from casual sex and particularly avoid sexual intercourse before you get married. This may sound prudish or old fashioned, but it is a time tested way by which we demonstrate respect for ourselves and others. Sex is not a game. It gives rise to very real enduring emotional and practical consequences. To ignore this is to debase yourself and to disregard the significance of human relationships. If, however, you know someone who has had casual sex, don't self righteously try to win them over to your own views. An active sex life within a framework of personal commitment augments the integrity of the people involved and is part of a flourishing life." (pg 57)

Sex is important but as the film with Barbara Streisand promotes, "The Mirror Has TWO Faces." Promiscuity is not fulfilling on a long term soul level, but the abstinence from sexual pleasure in a committed relationship also is not often fulfilling if both partners or spouses are able. "No matter how thin you slice it, there will always be two sides."-Baruch Spinoza. My husband and I have had prolonged periods due to surgery, birth or injury when we could not come together regularly in the bedroom. In that, we found other ways to connect. Sex isn't everything. But when we can and ARE able to be together, sex is also an important aspect of our relationship.

I was watching the third season of "Grace and Frankie" on Netflix. (Minor Spoilers ahead.) I love the show because it is based on the friendship of two older women who are first enemies but thrown together when their husbands decide to leave them for each other. I can relate to the characters of both Grace and Frankie because Grace is uptight and Frankie is a free spirit. I have both within me. I like that the show addresses pleasure for older people (as the seasons progress Grace and Frankie develop dildos for older women.) I admire the beauty of relationships within the seasons and how generally sex isn't treated casually but often more as a decision to enhance life or to further a partnership. HOWEVER, I had a hard time with the ending of the third season because the two males who were in partnership with each other, decided to deal with their problems in their marriage, by the consideration of adding a third person to "spice up" their marriage. 

First off, if that is how you roll, that is fine by me. But if you are wanting a satisfying LONG TERM partnership, research has repeatedly shown that a long term relationship is usually enhanced by fidelity. It depends on what the relationship goals are. If a marriage is floundering- cheating or adding a third person in is NEVER the answer. The couple thought they were rekindled by seeing the other flirted with. What was truly happening at a basic psychological level, is that they were realizing what they had, by having it threatened. By seeing someone else flirt or take interest in their spouse, they renewed their gaze on each other. Their misguided therapist gave them advice to "have an open relationship" and cited that "most gay relationships end up this way."

Well, yes they will end up that way, if our culture continues with those expectations, portrayals in the media, and that becomes the normative advice therapists or professionals counsel in. I celebrate gay marriages/partnerships that have commitment. Open relationships are for those very few who can manage the commitment of not one BUT TWO or more other souls. Sex does involve the soul. Very few, if any, people can manage to respect two souls and know with intimate kindness the joy of what a committed relationship brings but still equally give to both people. 

Honestly, the counselor should have perceived that having basic gratitude and developing a sense of appreciation with open communication would have negated the need for a third party to bring this out in the first place. There are other ways to come to the same conclusion without complicating matters with yet another human being. Human beings are complicated. Maybe some people can give to more than one? For my own limitations, I know I certainly can not. My husband deserves and needs my full commitment and I need his. This is part of the foundation we build upon with other virtues like consideration, respect, meeting half way, equalization, finding our roles, commitment and humour ect.

We all long to be loved. How we go about this is entirely our decision. I believe in self pleasure as a means for the single and the lonely. But I believe this should be combined with responsibility. In a partnership I have different rules. I am not a fan of the porn market and could have many posts dedicated to this, however, I have also have seen some people enhanced by choices opposite of mine. In most cases, who am I to judge, as along as it does not involve children, the harming of others, exploitation or the elevation of the body over the spirit? Unfortunately, the previous statements are often found in most cases of pornography.

There are stages and ages of marriage/ partnership. Marriage/partnership is an active choice. It can be immensely fulfilling. It has been one of THE best decisions of my life. It has also been the most painful at times. But I also recognize it is not the ONLY decision to make for a fulfilled life. Many of my single friends prove this to be true. They have meaningful, insightful and productive lives. Some personalities have a propensity to partnership more than others. For myself, I have always desired from a young age to share my life vulnerably and intimately with one person...and to have few friendships otherwise to protect my time and space. That will not be everyone's choice. But since I CHOSE marriage, and since it is NOT an abusive situation ( to which I would give very different advice) I do believe in the sanctity of commitment.

Certain sacrifices are required for any situation in life. In a fulfilled marriage it is often important due to human jealousies, vulnerabilities and weakness, to respect and forgo the opportunity to connect on a sexual level with other people. "Most people tend to delude themselves into thinking that freedom comes from doing what feels good or what fosters comfort and ease. The truth is that people who subordinate reason to their feelings of the moment are actually slaves of their desires or aversions. They are ill prepared to act effectively and nobly when unexpected challenges occur, as they inevitably will. Authentic freedom places demands on us. In discovering and comprehending our fundamental relations to one another and zestfully performing our duties, true freedom, which all people long for, is indeed possible." (pg 44)

What do you wish from a marriage or long term partnership? Most people wish for that one person to witness life with. To share their soul and whom understands them more than the rest of the world. To celebrate love and to weather tragedy. Well then, if that is what is wanted, there ARE going to be sacrifices. "Different people are made for different things. Just as certain capacities are required for success in a particular area, so too are certain sacrifices required. If you wish to become proficient in the art of living with wisdom, do you think that you can eat and drink to excess? DO you think you can continue to succumb to anger and your usual habits of frustration and unhappiness? NO. If true wisdom is your object and you are sincere, you will have to work on yourself. You will have to overcome many unhealthy cravings and knee- jerk reactions. You will have to reconsider whom you associate with. Are your friends and associates worthy people? Does their influence- their habits, values, and behaviour- elevate you or reinforce the slovenly habits from which you seek escape? The life of wisdom, like anything else, demands it's price. You may, in following it, be ridiculed, and even end up with the worst of everything in all parts of your public life, including your career, your social standing...Venture forth with your utmost effort. Make the necessary sacrifices that are the price for the worthies of goals; freedom, even mindedness and tranquility. If, however, upon honestly appraising your mettle, you are not fit or ready, free yourself from delusion and tread a different, more realistic road. (Pages 40 and 41)

Obviously if I watch (and love) most of Glee I believe in sexuality, preference and choice. But it actually doesn't matter what I believe. What matters is what you believe. We must always be committed to resolving our own ideals with what the current culture's ideals are. So what if we are the minority? So what if we fall into the majority? There are benefits and hardships in both. What is important is seeing the root issue, our desires and manifesting those with our ethics and actions. 

What I disliked about the therapists advice in Grace and Frankie, is that it's ultimate root reason was flawed. A third person won't give the partners a renewed spice in their relationship. The root issue is that they needed to recognize with gratitude what they had and choose to engage in the bedroom regularly. The third person was a flawed way to get to the same conclusion but with more damage in the end. It's not in human nature to share and it's rare for people to be able to honour two people with equality. Or to deal with the inevitable sorrows and insecurities that will come later after the deed was done. Was that person "better in the bedroom? ect." These questions often will arise because just like we have a nature to explore and "try out" many partners, we also have a nature to be "the only" to one significant person or to be in an "epic love story." Well, which one is it? You can't have both.

I understand I will attract critics for this point of view. Since I believe in self pleasure in some cases and love in many forms I will be a target for the conservative. Since I also believe in sanctity of commitment and saving sex for committed relationships I will be a target for the liberal. Again, these are just my thoughts and how I need to walk in the world. DO what you need to do that fits the core of whom you are. Just remember, "Those who pursue the higher life of wisdom, who seek to live by spiritual principles, must be prepared to be laughed and condemned. Many people who have progressively lowered their personal standards in an attempt to win social acceptance and life's comforts bitterly resent those of philosophical bent who refuse to compromise their spiritual ideals and who seek to better themselves. Never live your life in reaction to these diminished souls. Be compassionate towards them and at the same time hold to what you know is good. When you begin your program of spiritual progress, chances are the people closest to you will deride or accuse you of arrogance.  If you allow the mean spirited opinions of others to make you waver in your purpose, you incur double shame." (pg.)

VULGARITY and CURRENT CULTURE (MRS. MAISEL and Other Preferences):

"Most of what passes for legitimate entertainment is inferior or foolish and only caters to or exploits people's weaknesses. Avoid being one of the mob who indulges such pastimes. Your life is too short and you have important things to do. Be discriminating about what images and ideas you put into your mind. If you yourself don't choose what thoughts and images you expose yourself to, someone else will and their motives may not be the highest. It is the easiest thing in the world to slide imperceptibly into vulgarity. But there's no need for that to happen if you determine not to waste your time and attention on mindless pap." ( page 53)

I personally enjoy entertainment and have no guilt in what I pursue. However, I have had to ask myself lately if what I am consuming lines up with the inner light of whom I am and what I want to put out into the world. Sometimes I enjoy a good laugh (Jumanji 2017) or an epic whimsy of song and dance (The Greatest Showman 2017) or an inspiring film about the intricacies of family and the importance of kindness (Wonder 2017) but at other times I realize what I am watching does not suit whom I am. For instance, "The Marvellous Mrs. Maisel" has been receiving accolades and awards. As it should be for it's sets, costumes, music and design. I love that time period but I generally disliked the show. Why? First off, I don't like nudity even if it's to make a point, thrown into my shows. Nudity is natural but I'm a visual person and prefer to restrict the images in my mind. I was asked to give it another chance when I shut it off during the first episode. I was told the nudity was to make a point that was justified later so I watched the rest of the series.

Luckily, I listened to my judgment of not spending much of my time on it, and viewed on fast forward. I enjoyed some sequences and I liked the focus on women's issues and unfair treatment. But, for myself, I definitely did not enjoy the stand up comedy. First off, I don't tend to get humour the way most people do so it wasn't funny for me. The wit was there and I recognized it, like I did in Gilmore Girls. But so was the vulgarity. I understand the show was portraying that women got penalized for using vulgar language when men did not. But my question is "Why is vulgar language necessary at all?" 

My best friend can attest to the fact that I can be a potty mouth at times. I don't believe in bad words - only bad uses of them towards other people. So yes, words are subjective to me and based on circumstance. However, I also dislike hearing a phrase like, "My husband came home for a F  _ _ _." Really? If that is how you view engaging with your spouse, then it shows how cheap that act is for you. And in that case, she was angry because he cheated on her. But all the stand up comedy on the show seemed to be celebrating the vulgar. I get that it is showing the stark contrast to how that whole time period was expected to behave out in public or portray in the media, but does vulgarity give any more beauty to our culture as a whole?

Of course we need authenticity. Authenticity in language? YES! A resounding yes. We can use language freely as long as we are not harming another. But when we treat an entire subject matter with carelessness, our values will lower as well. That is what I took issue with as being a viewer and why I decided to watch on fast forward. I liked the costumes and some of the wit so I watched a few parts but I knew that my mind, personally, would only be bothered and lowered by the actual stand up. It's simply not for me.

In the case above, Mrs. Maisel's usage was more justified in her circumstance. She was angry and cheated upon and expected to conform to patriarchy so she was speaking out. But during most of the show, sex was treated as a vulgarity. While sex certainly can be incredibly vulgar, sex can also be a beautiful, connected, satisfying part of life. I guess I prefer to look wherever I can, for the beauty. "Try whenever possible, if you notice the conversation around you decaying into palaver, to see if you can subtly lead the conversation back to more constructive subjects. If, however, you find yourself among indifferent strangers, you can simply remain silent. Be of good humour and enjoy a good laugh when it is apt, but avoid the kind of unrestrained barroom laughter, that easily degenerates into vulgarity or malevolence. Laugh WITH, but never AT." (pg 52.) The people and stories used in most of the stand up comedy in this circumstance were being laughed AT and not WITH. If you love the Marvellous Mrs. Maisel and do not see it like I do, by all means enjoy it. There are many merits to the show and most of it is well crafted. Honour YOUR soul, not mine. My duty is to honour what my soul engages with. Another person may not be bothered at all or see merit where I do not.

"Popular perceptions, values, and ways of doing things are rarely the wisest. Many pervasive beliefs would not pass appropriate tests of rationality. Conventional thinking- it's means and ends- is essentially uncreative and uninteresting. Its job is to preserve the status quo for overly self defended individuals and institutions. On the other hand there is no inherent virtue in new ideas. Judge ideas and opportunities on the basis of whether they are life giving. Give your assent to that which promotes humanness, justice, beneficial growth, kindness, possibility and benefit to the human community. Examine things as they appear to your own mind; objectively consider what is said by others and then establish your OWN CONVICTIONS. Socially taught beliefs are frequently unreliable. So many of our beliefs have been acquired through accident and irresponsible or ignorant teaching. Many of these beliefs are so deeply ingrained that they are hidden from our own view. The commonplace sluggishness of the lives lived by the undisciplined is dangerously contagious, for we are often exposed to no alternative healthful way of living. Awaken and be vigilant. Take stock of your habits to preserve your higher standards." (pg. 83.)

THE PEOPLE WE CHOSE TO BE WITH AND SOCIAL MEDIA:

"Just because some people are nice to you doesn't mean you should spend time with them. Just because they seek you out and are interested in you or your affairs doesn't mean you should associate with them. Be selective about whom you take on as friends, colleagues and neighbours. All of these people can affect your destiny. The world is full of agreeable and talented folk. The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you, whose presence calls forth your best. But remember that our moral influence is a two way street, and we should thus make sure by our own thoughts, words and deeds to be positive influence on those we deal with. The real test of personal excellence lies in the attention we give to the often neglected small details of our conduct."

People are just people, regardless of their wisdom, talent or social standing. The minute we see this is the minute we forgive both ourselves and others. We are affected by those around us and we only have so much time to invest in what is life giving and honouring of our specific paths.

"One of two things will happen when you socialize with others. You either become like your companions or you bring them over to your own ways. Just as when a dead coal contacts a live one either the first will extinguish the last or the last kindle the first. Great is the danger, so be circumspect on entering into personal associations, even and especially light hearted ones. Most of us do not possess sufficiently developed steadfastness to steer our companions to our own purpose so we end up being carried along by the crowd. Our own values and ideals become fuzzy and tainted, our resolve is destabilized. It is hard to resist when friends or associates start speaking brashly. Caught off guard ...we are swept away be social momentum..." (pg 98.)

In the age of social media, the point above is becoming more important. I could waste days in the comments section of many of my favourite articles and come out feeling yucky despite the goodness of what was said. I actively choose not to be on Facebook, not because it is inherently bad, but because I know the influence of what goes in the mind, comes out in varied ways. I need to protect my space as an avid consumer of information. 


"It is unrealistic to expect people to see you as you see yourself. If people reach conclusions based on false impressions, they are the ones hurt rather than you. Because it is they who are misguided. When someone interprets a true proposition as a false one, the propositions itself hurt only the person who holds the wrong view is deceived and thus damaged. Once you clearly understand this, you will be less likely to feel affronted by others, even if they revile you." (pg.71.)


WISDOM/ BOOKS/ And GROWTH:

"Don't just say you have read books. Show that through them you have learned to think better, to be a more discriminating and reflective person. Books are the training weights of the Mind. They are very helpful but it would be a bad mistake to suppose that one has made progress simply by having internalized their contents." (pg. 97.)

Obviously action follows internalization...or else dismissal. Internalizing is the first step, just like the first few weights will not show developed muscles, there are stages to everything. The importance is growth and continued perseverance to the next stage.

"Take care not to casually discuss matters that are of great importance to you with people who are not important to you. Your affairs will become drained of preciousness. You undercut your own purposes when you do this. This is especially dangerous when you are in the early stages of an undertaking. Other people feast like vultures on our ideas. They take it upon themselves to blithely interpret, judge and twist what matters most to you and your heart sinks. Let your ideas and plans incubate before you parade them in front of the naysayers and trivializers. Most people only know how to respond to an idea by pouncing on it's shortfalls rather than identifying it's potential merits. Practise self containment so that your enthusiasm won't be frittered away." ( pg.110.)

My husband and I continually made the mistake in our early years of announcing all of our thoughts and deeds. We didn't realize we could keep our thoughts to ourselves and still garner support for the important things. It was a tough lesson to learn. We still are verbal on spaces we create, like my blog for instance, but now we exercise forethought. The contents are specified mostly to the medium we are using. These considerations also protect our marriage.

"Your restless pursuit of wisdom postpones you actually possessing it. Quit chasing after tonics and new teachers. The latest fashionable sage or book or diet or belief doesn't move you in the flourishing life.YOU DO. Renounce externals once and for all. Practice self sufficiency. Don't remain a dependent, malleable patient. Become your own soul's doctor." (pg. 107.)

"Become your own soul's doctor." YES!!! If we do not look after our soul and body, who else will? We must become the charges of our own paths. Life happens, yet within that happening, we ARE.

"Why should we bother being good? To be good is to be happy; to be tranquil and worry free. When you actively engage in gradually refining yourself you retreat from your lazy ways of covering yourself or making excuses. Instead of feeling a persistent current of low level shame, you move forward by using the creative possibilities of THIS moment, your current situation. You begin to fully inhabit this moment, instead of seeking escape or wishing that what is going on were otherwise. You move THROUGH your life by being thoroughly IN it." (pg. 103.)

PURSUE THE GOOD and THE ART OF LIVING:

"Pursue the good ardently. But if your efforts fall short, accept the result and move on." (pg 104.)

I love how we are encouraged to pursue good but there is also a built in grace to moving on when we fall short. This negates the vicious cycle of shame we often can get caught up in. With shame, we dwell on the past. With shame we forget to live in the now. Yet mistakes will be inevitable as "to err is to be human." What is important is to try our best and keep growing. It's imperative that we "Caretake this moment." (pg 113.)

All the above quotes are just a few morsels of practical wisdom in the book, "The Art of Living." Obviously any additions were my personal tangents. I highly recommend the easy read to be artful in the pursuit of your own personal living. The link can be found on my library page.



"Give your best and always be kind." (pg. 113.)

                                                     
Song Choices: I decided to go to my more conservative, old country roots for this post's song choices. I love country songs from the 70's, 80's, and 90's...and a few from this current age. Especially the songs that tell stories of love, family or commitment. It was a sign to me at a young age that these concepts would be my personal choices. I was drawn to them and yearned for my own version of commitment and hard work within a family. THAT SAID, I also have used country songs in the past to celebrate being single, enjoying the good life of sensory bliss in moderation, and hearing a story within a song. My first choice is for ALL people- single, married, with families or on their own:

Song choice for everyone: I hope you Dance- Leanne Womack 

Song choice for married/ partnered/ committed families: That's what it's all about- Brooks and Dunn
 

Song Choice for My husband: I Hope You're the End of My Story- Pistol Annies



American Idiot- Green Day

4 comments:

Philip CalledtoQuestion said...

Wow! Such amazing insight. I love this book, your words and your truth. 'Inspirational, thats what you are'

Kmarie A. said...

Lol "Unforgettable, though near or far...that's why darling, its incredible, that someone so unforgettable- thinks that I am unforgettable ( or inspirational) too..." It is a good book. There is a time for everything, and for myself currently, stoicism is a needed balm for certain aspects of life. But as you know next week I could write some epicurean wisdom. lol...but there is a lot of wisdom we can glean from philosophy. I am glad you found some insight.

S said...

Such a powerful post, thanks for writing and sharing. There is so much wisdom in all the quotes and passages. I also believe in them and they provided me with guidance when I felt lost or disoriented. It has been long since I re-read these passages. I have always believed in and followed some kind of philosophy in various stages of my life. These philosophies kept changing but the inherent wisdom in all of them were similar. Generally I am drawn to the Buddhist mindfulness philosophy and this book echoes similar thought process. Currently, I am reading and learning about "Non-dual philosophy or Advaita" as taught by Nisargadutta Maharaj and Ramana Maharishi. The book I am currently reading is "I Am That". It is a difficult read but I am reading it, a little everyday.
I also agree with you on the'Vulgarity" part. Bing a sensitive person, vulgarity,conflict and violence in real life or in movies puts me off, so much so that I sometimes fast forward certain scenes while watching something. But to a point of course, if there is too much vulgarity in scenes/dialogues, I would rather not watch it /complete it.

Kmarie A. said...

S: Yes we need different words for different growth seasons as challenge or inspiration. That sounds very interesting! Let me know if it was worth your time or the highlights and then I may check it out:)

Yes, Agreed.Some people are not bothered and that is fine. Sensitive people need to do more to protect their minds. And it is sometimes a matter of perspective...FOr instance some epsiodes of Glee upon jumping in would be considered vulgar...there are a few i usually skip HOWEVER, most of the time it simply the profane made to make a point, and pretty much always, if the episode is left to the end result it actually comes back to an ethical question or a morally balanced opinion of the previous. It is often brief or getting to a ethic or asking a question or viewpoint that I can get behind. Not always but mostly...and there are some episodes that I would not subject certain personalities too...like I think older people around 80 should skip the series entirely unless they are extremely flexible - my one grandparent would probably like it, the other two would be horrified...so I do think it is a matter of preference and perspective too :) I dont think MRS Maisel is a bad show. In fact, I will probably watch season 2 on FF. I just didnt love the stand up aspects which I know it centers around:)